Diaries of a 74M Crew: Where the Hardware Fails the Software...

My first flight on the goddamned aircraft today…
N ohhhh boy.. wat to expect..

I’m writing this in loo of my hotel room now…
Cos CB Langham can only provide 1 freaking smoking room for a whole set of 17 crew…
ONE….

And ciggies r needed for inspiration for bitching sessions…
Wat more… no internet… much less wireless..
So am writing this in a heat on Word.
……………………………………
In the briefing room…all the stories come out le.. to share wat to anticipate…

To all comments… the usual dreamy Dodo will only have comments to make in her own head…
Let me share..


“Er… somehow.. seat 30D got no headset jack… so we just hope that the seat is not occupied…”

-Huh? How did the MAS people operate all these years on that aircraft (n mind u it’s pretty old… it was grounded the nite b4 for dunno wat reason)) with a seat with no headset outlet but a screen for movies ah?
My colleague could only joke.. “Eiy!! Can put a deaf pax there lei!!

“hmmm.. 6 handsets are missing from the seats in economy. No replacement cos shortage of parts (diff from our company standard, so no surprise), so we wonder wat have been done…


On my flight become 7 le, as a little girl wove her detached handset at me… -__-

“The last flight I did, a few seats in business din work.. then the screen at seat XX spoil…
Another cover on screen XX kinda fell off…
The engineers at AKL tested it… but on the way back the same screen fell off… so think when they tested it was okie ah..”

-NB, like that also can… -___-“

So… with the inflight supervisors’ encouragement of “ We try to take it in stride lar hor. Dun take things too personally. At the end of the day, we take it that it’s the company’s inadequacies n we jus handle it as best as we can as Crew. After all, that’s wat we are here for.”

-So that's wat cabin crew r for... punching bags for angry frustrated people who can't get wat they paid for... ;(

Amidst all the stories of as much as 65 service recovery vouchers(which is fuckin fuckin a lot for the uninitiated) given out n lots of “sorry sorry sorry” onboard… I tot… Nabei.. That’s wat’s my job is about… “SORRY-ing” as opposed to “SOARING”.

I already damn jaded after my MC episode le..
b4 flight today, I actually flipped thru the Recruit Section earnestly for the fucking first time in 3 years…
And tore out one…
And decided to send out my updated resume (hence brought my lappie to AKL) n send out just to see if after flying for 3 years I still have market value.

Then now… this…
Ch**Bye Aircraft…
……………………………………………..

Onboard we go…
But not without a fag to anticipate the stressful flight to expect..

Extra ground duties

-To open all 306 or so airvents (machiam like the Airbus days which the senior crew lamented bout) Divided by 4 of us, that’s still quite a handful of “nipple-like” twisting to do…

-Stowage problems in the Aft cabin… but ain’t as bad as the 300ER.

-Galley. Absolute catastrophe. No ice bins. No chiller compartments for drinks. No galley top space(as if the 300ER in EY) 2nd meals catered in airlardas, so is ice. Old skool methods of dry ice is used on dry stores. Much muscle n coolie strength is needed to reorganize it to workable conditions. Not only that. NO CLOSED COMPARTMENTS. So everything crew prepared like sugar n milk pods n serviettes n stuff all gone.

After Take off

-Zone C, Economy - Flooded by condensation upon take off. Pax all standing up when aircraft still in ascent. HOW how HowWwwwwW???? Pax getting rained on… cannot help it..


-Attending to all impossible attendant call lights. “ my seat wet!!!” “ My seat got no handset control” “ my seat blah blah blah blah blah” NBKNNNBCBBBB*


-Time taken to give out relevant stuff like headsets n all is extended due to these series of unfortunate events. Leading crew to me :“I have no time to talk to pax now, can u jus tell them bleah bleah bleah.. I gotta attend to the condensation prob…”


-Prep of Wine Beer Juice in galley longer cos no space. Supper time overdue… NB still need to do ice cream!! Supper lei!

Also when I switched on the ovens to heat meals… they each sounded like an overaged nuclear generator powering up to explode..
We all looked at each other going, “is that normal???” fucking scary~
Wahahahahahah~ :D

-No trash compactors onboard. So a simple thing like throwing rubbish has to have a method… to save as much space as possible… NB~


Sighhhhhh…

It was a perfect example of controlled chaos… but all handled with chagrin n most importantly…. A smile on the face…

This is only the first leg…
Everyone was sleeping cos of the time…

I’m Soooooooooo dreading the flight back… where it will be a day flight..n everyone awake…expecting their movies to work.. their games to work…their 2nd round of coffees, their much needed boredom induced hunger… bleah bleah bleah…

We asked the AKL groundstaff…

“Will these problems b resolved?”

“Nooooooooo”

N we realized….

They will never be… cos this aircraft is put on a more torturous schedule than us… shuttling between Sin n Akl nightly… daily….. 7 days a week…for the next 10months… with no sufficient ground time in between…

N so … the 300 or so crew (include. me) will encounter the same prob on each n every akl flight… Til the teething prob gets better… or til the end of time… (sobs~)
………………………………..

I slept like a baby the entire day… thru meal calls…
N reflected over dinner, white wine n beer in the room…

I damn sian…

I dun wanna be a tai tai cos I get edgy without work…

I not enough moolah to start my own business…

I was losing passion cos I demotivated le…

I did explore the idea of quitting n getting a ground job… Cos this is getting nowhere… n as a wise man once told me :”Passion is v important in our line of work. Without passion, we won’t be able to get thru another day in this demanding industry…where someone else’s need transcends ours…”

I did explore the possibility of quitting n going to study… n in the process.. go back to my bohemian days of moonlighting as a nonchalant bartender/waitress.

Waking up, go class… nite go work. After work go drink.. no worries bout the day after… except for oncoming projects or whatever… aka my days at Penny Black, when I was in between jobs…

Wat talent do I have???? sigh~

I’m not like Deniz. Can freelance design n do nails n oHHhhhh, he gonna start a nail school laR!!

I have not reached management level in the service line… I can’t run a freakin restaurant…unless my father got $$.. heh

I dun wanna work in a bank cos I’m completely clueless..

I wanna be in the fashion industry, but im without the relevant dip/deg. N that’s still not my topmost passion… (PassiOooN!!..in a french accent) sound like patience too… for… hee hee~ ;D

My specialization seems to be in pampering n pacifying n PR-ing..

N I decided…

Since I love organized chaos.. (as from the days of Dome).. n cussin disgusting customers after in the name of fun… ;D
Since I NEED to sleep in on weekdays n have been used to working on public hols n weekends…
Since all my close frenz (like Von n many people I can relate to) are in the service sectors too (Von I love you!!!)

I WILL stick it out. Be strong. (cos encouragement given) n stick it out til this aircraft finishes its lease…

So there is the resolve of the Fly Girl…
Cos she always can look back fondly… n laugh at all the anecdotes… n tell her children all her incredibly boh liao stories..

LOL*
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I only hope the boyfriend can understand…
Thru all the whinings n complaints…
My resolve to be a Fly Girl..

;) *ginger smile*