New Year Resolutions

Finally, I get some ME time... and it's already the 6th...

They are working me to the bone!!!!
And always away on weekends!! Nabei bananas!!
i miss partying lei... aiyohhh...~

Anyhoo... I kept thinking bout my New year resolutions...
i din wanna make n break them so I tot better be realistic n not be too hard on myself...
I only came up with 2... which I think will significantly help to improve my quality of life n to stop me from dropping into depression or shit like that...

And I absolutely hate new years...
My years always start out shitty... n only settle in around July-Aug period... where the rewards come in n the relationships get comfy.
New Years are always shaky, super uncertain... just hate hate hate.

Moreover, when you live your life out according to monthly rosters... you start to wonder bout the meaning of life sometimes... more uncertainty... more unexpected things jumping into your path... chaos...

So this year... I endeavour to:

1) Listen to the head, NOT the heart. Cos the heart no longer makes sense.

My darling friend Von always say to me... "No feelings no feelings!! Aiyoh, everytime see ghost still not scared of the dark ah!"

Yup, i really need more frenz like these to knock sense into me.
I just stopped seeing the jerk in jerks...
By reminding myself constantly to feel with my head... I won't end up doing or saying stuff I will regret after...well hopefully the head is always strong enough to overpower the heart.

2) Love thyself; more than anything else!

2006 is gonna be a year dedicated to me, myself, n I alone.
I expect to spend loads on spa packages, nails, facials, waxes... all things to pamper myself...
According to some Buddhist books I read... Only by knowing how to love oneself, can one truly know how to love another.

Could this be true?
Maybe I dunno how to love myself that's why I always feel so shortchanged n washed out in relationships?
If this is gonna help me feel more fulfilled.... why not try it?

No more sacrifices, doing things I dun like, being there for people when I'm tired... just me time, me love, me me me.
Sound like a selfish bitch rite?

Fuck, take it or leave it.
Of cos I'm still gonna be a loyal n steadfast friend... but I'm just not gonna invest anything in relationships this year.
It's gonna be a good break for me from all the fucked up hoo-haa of love-love stuff...


Well... 6 days into the New Year... bit shaky my faith... but I find it useful just repeating the above 2 points in my head over n over again. Kind of like a inner pep talk...

Right now... I'm gonna spend my Me time snuggled in bed... Nights!